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No title ...I don't even like this one.

You might want to read the entry before this one....

Apparently I was wrong.

It wasn't that I was being too sensitive...my husband was clearly NOT supportive.

Or, because I have had a few adult beverages I have a wonky view of things.

Let me give you some background...

This weekend was my motorcycle course...which I was told would be all encompassing, I would be exhausted at the end of the day, be sure to drink Gatorade, eat lots of protein, don't plan ANY extracuricullar (or however the fuck you spell that, I really don't care) activities.

Friday day, I'm stressing...not like me...but I am. I have a little skirmish with the hubby but I don't think it's bad. I'm just a little touchy.

I do, however, tell him that I am competely freaked out about this course.

This same weekend we have scheduled his cousin's wife's baby shower. I have RSVP'd that I cannot attend because I will be at the course.

Hubby's mom says they will be having everyone back to the house on Sunday and that I should go - I say ok, if I'm up to it.

Friday night . I have to leave work at 6 and go buy a shower gift for Sunday shower. Hubby 's mom has said and so has hubby that I could stop by the in-laws house after shopping and visit with all the out-of-town and in-town in-laws (who I incidentally LOOOOOOVE) but I go shopping and head to the gated community and can't get in because when I call the house I only get the answering machine.

Really, all I want to do is spend the evening with my husband talking me down from the freakin' ledge of stress that I've built for myself. I can't get into the gated fucking community so I drive home. I call them when I arrive home...still no answer. Hubby finally shows up at about 9:00 ...no explanation as to why no one let me in the gate.

He tells me not to stress I'll do fine...and by 'tells me' I mean that is the exact sentence he says and no more.

Saturday he tells me again "You'll do fine, you've been doing great" and off I go to my course.

I spend all day Saturday in this course in a parking lot in the 80 degree heat in a leather jacket learning stuff that I have never even heard 4 months ago.

I come home and there is no one here. I figure hubby and the kids are at his mom's again but really how hard would it have been to be home when I get here to prop me up or tell me I did ok or even hear how my day went.

One hour after I get home I get a call from the Loopy's. 10 minutes after that I get a call from my husband asking if I want him to bring me some leftovers home. I say no I already ate. I tell him a little of my day. Say that I am going to have a beer and then just relax. Is he coming home?

Yeah, in a little bit.

Two and a half hours later I call him and ask, are you still at your mom's? He says "Yeah, we're playing Euchre."
I say, "I'm a little disappointed that you didn't come home."

He says "Why"

I say "Never mind...I'm going to bed, I'm exhausted."

HE's says "ok. bye"

I just hang up.

I go to sleep. He gets home about a half an hour later. I don't get up because really I need all the sleep I can get.

In the morning I get up, get ready and no one even wakes up. I am so stressed that I seriously considering throwing up. I leave.

I go to my course. I fail.

I come home. I tell hubby and kids. I tell the Loopy's.

Later in the night hubby says "If you just relaxed you could pass. If you just relaxed you could pass the test tomorrow."

I say "If I could have just relaxed?....I can't even DO the test tomorrow. And if I could JUST relax I'd have no issue."

He says "If you'd just calm down..."

He says it like it's something I'm doing on purpose. I'm just being dramatic.