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The Circus has come to town

I don't even know how to start this entry because there's just too much backstory I'd have to go through....

But seriously if I don't rant about all this ...and soon...things are gonna go ugly real fast.

Okay...you'll remember when the ex and I first split up he wanted to keep the house and I thought I couldn't afford to keep so it was agreed that I would leave and he would give me my equity out of it.

And then...he changed his mind in a fit of anger and listed it for sale and told me I could wait for my share of the equity, which threw my own house buying plans into disarray.

You'll also recall at one manic, fear induced point I actually offered to sign over the title of said house just to be done with it and to be able to move on. He asked for more and I took that deal off the table.

and then...remember I managed to creatively purchase my new house without having my name taken off the deed of the old house and without needing the equity out of that one either...apparently if you back me into the corner I get all freakin creative and independent and shit.

So I had my house - he was living in that house and it was up for sale.

Then we went to court to hammer out some logistics and when my lawyer said that he should be paying $210 a month in child support him and his lawyer started whining about how he's paying all of the mortgage and all of the taxes and all of the insurance on a house that my name is still on. So the judge factored all that in and came up with a new amount for child support $137 a month. Reducing the amoutn he shoud pay me in consideration of I "should" be contributing to the mortgage.

So then...omg..I'm even getting sick of this.

Idiot ex decides that he can't afford to stay in that house. He calls me and tells me that he's moving out and moving in with his parents so that he can save money for a downpayment on a house when this one finally sells. 'Cause he's thinking that if he lives with his parents and not IN the house then I will have to pay half the mortgage.

Are you motherfucking kidding me?

I explain that my contribution to the mortgage is the reason why his sorry butt only has to pay $137 a month in child support.

Blah blah blah. And part of me doesn't really believe he's going to move himself and the 3 kids that he has 50% of the time in with his parents. This is just him puttin on the whole drag ensemble and being a drama queen. But, my pets, NOOOOOOOO. this man actually packed up all his and kids belongings and put some in storage and moved his idiot self in with his parents....leaving the matrimonial-for sale- house vacant. He's paying the mortgage on it still...But this is his plan to s-a-v-e m-o-n-e-y.

Jesus save us from the ridiculous, circus-music playing brain of that man.

So now him and the kids are living there...well except for my Potatie ...she made it exactly 31 hours at her grandparents before she had 3 adults (daddy, gramma and grampa telling her when to put her pajamas on and when to sleep and what to sleep in...31 hours before I got a frantic, sob-laden phone call from the girl sayin she wanted to live with me. Her dad dropped her off on my doorstep and then I find out...and THEN I FIND OUT...

...that she was so upset because her father had shoved her because she got sassy with gramma.

The sassiness = after being told by not one, not two but three adults to put her pajamas on even though she explained that she liked to sleep in whatever t-shirt she wore that day - she was making her way to her dresser which was IN THE GARAGE and gramma asked where she was going and she said "To get my pajamas in the garage where do you think they are?"

And for this her dad got out of his chair walked to her in a way that caused her to back up and he shoved her hard enough that she had to step back a few feet.

He has since told her that she can return only after she apologizes to his mother (which for the record I agree with...no need to disrespect your grandparents).

BUT, I also believe that the Dumbass should discuss with his parents that HE is the parent and if he is there they should just step back and let him do the parenting. I also believe the Dumbass should not be putting his hands on my kids. We have never disciplined in that fashion before and I will not allow it now. I also believe tht Dumbass owes his daughter an apology for losing his temper in such a way. She's told me that the shove really scared her and now she doesn't want to live with him.

So she stayed with me for the weekend and my regular monday and Tuesday and was supposed to go home to him WEdnesday after school. Wednesday more she tearfully said to me that she didn't want to stay there. I told her she needed to apologize to her gramma and probably talking to her dad would be a good thing. But if she wanted to come back to me she was always welcome..always.

I even called DA (dumbass) and explained that she was nervous and maybe he could just talk to her. I said that she was scared and saying that she didn't want to go back. He said if she didn't want to stay he would drive her back to my house.

School is out at 3:00...at 3:27 I get another big teary call from her saying she doesn't want to stay, she wants to live with me and that her dad said that "yeah he pushed her and she's lucky he didn't put her over his knee and spank her til she couldn't sit"

Yeaaah, nice talking skills.

So I talked to him and asked if he really said that and he called her a liar and said he wasn't driving her anywhere that I could come get her. So I did. And she's been at my house since and he has made no big effort to discuss CALMLY the situation...his stance is now and apparently forever will be "There are rules in this house and if she doesn't want to follow them she can get out."

Ya'll remember right? She's 13 years old.

So she's with me and I'm not giving her back unless she asks for it or I'm ordered to do it.

Oh...and today I got a notice in the mail saying my property taxes from the matrimonial home...are in arrears.
And I found out that not only is DA and my kids living at his parents so is his sister who has apparently split from her husband. So my oldest is sharing a bed with her Aunt Dumbass.

Now, I ask you...why would he not have just asked his sister to move in with him and share some of the cost? Instead of uprooting the 3 children to go stay in a 3 bedroom house with 4 adults and 3 kids....sweet jesus.

Circus tunes...that's all I think you can find in that head of his...just circus tunes and cricket noises.

4:59 p.m. - 2009-05-08

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