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42 more days until the big 4-0


Okay, so I've fiddled with my template and done some HTML stuff and I am still nowhere near where I want this diary to be but I'll get there, don't you worry.

Anyway, on to more important things.

It is 42 days til my 40th birthday. I am NOT freaked out about this. Most people, I know, get depressed or something when the hit the 4-0. But I'm kind of looking forward to it. And here is the reason why...

Ages ago I was watching Oprah and she was talking about turning 40 and how it really is a wonderful time because (and this will all be in Oprah-speak but I'll translate) you really come into your own, you are comfortable in your skin, you can take responsibility for every aspect of your life and you are more secure and less worried about what others think and ...big drumroll please...you know the word "no" and as a result you are more assertive with others and can stand up for yourself.

Which means...in my case...I will stop being everyone's go to girl. I will stop letting people say mean or hurtful things to me without telling them they just said something mean and hurtful. I will stop putting everyone's convenience before mine and my family's.

I tell ya, I can't wait to turn 40.

And I know, turning 40 isn't going to change my personality. It's not gonna make a difference and if I know what is wrong why don't I just change it now? That's exactly what G (my husband) told me. And intellectually it's right but I've somehow got it in my head that I will be different and you know what, if that works for me....I'm going with it.

Here are some specific examples so you know the kind of think I'm hoping to get rid of:

I had a "friend" once who, when I invited her and her husband and her 3 incredibly bratty kids over for our annual BBQ, said to me (in these exact words) "Yeah, ok we'll come unless something better comes up"

Sweet baby Moses on a tricycle!!!!

Who the hell says that to someone out loud??? And I didn't say anything back because A) I couldn't really believe I heard right and B)that's the kind of thing I would just not respond to but then would complain about for weeks afterward. Now that I'm feeling 40 I would so say something right back.

I have a sister who a few weeks ago came by to see the new house. She said she was coming in the morning before I went to work. I work at 10 so I told her I would be leaving at 9:30.
9:25 she pulls up in my driveway. Now normally I would have made her a coffee and gave her a big tour and then driven like a freakin' banshee to get to work on time. But, as I am feeling 40, as she walked in I said "I am on my way out the door but I can give you a quick tour from the bathroom while I brush my teeth and by the way, why are you just getting here now?"
She replies that she got a little bit of a late start and she had to go to the grocery store and she had to stop at my other sister's for coffee because that's what they do on Saturday morning.

?????

What
the
fuck?

I inquire as to why didn't she just come here first and then go have coffee, or for that matter bring my other sister with her. She says she didn't know if sister #2 would want to do that...to which I reply that it didn't really matter if she wanted to you should have done it.

Yeeeaaahhh. I'm so looking forward to 40.

Adios,
reader

P.S Here is my question of the week?
If you could not have the job you have now but you could have any job and money or schooling or age were not a factor what would it be?
I am a librarian and I love it but I would be a radio talk show host. Leave me a note and let me know.


9:25 a.m. - 2006-07-30

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